Simple Steps to Finding Peace
Today I was reminded of a poem that has hung prominently in every home I’ve ever lived in…”Desiderata”. Reading it reminds me to honor and respect all humankind, my God, Mother Earth and most importantly, myself, and I know I have found peace.
What I love most about this poem, is that at different times in my life, different passages have spoken to me in a way that has brought me great comfort.
When my life was particularly chaotic, I clung to the words, “Go placidly amid the noise and the haste…”, and “in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul.”
When I’ve been afraid, I’ve been reminded, “Do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.”
When I question my worthiness, when I wonder out-loud “Am I good enough?”, I simply turn to this print and affirm, “You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.”
When my world fell apart, and my faith was wavering, I read “And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.” and once again I could “be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.”
And I when I most needed to believe that I would be OK, I found hope in the words “With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.”
And slowly, one step at a time, I found peace.
So I share the full poem here with you, in the hope that you, too, will find peace in this writing by Max Ehrmann. And maybe, you’ll print it out and place it somewhere in your space so you can be reminded, as I am, of the awesome power of these words.
Desiderata
Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love,
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.
– written by Max Ehrmann in the 1920s —
A Vow of Independence
As we celebrate Independence Day here in the United States, I find my thoughts once again dwelling on the concepts of freedom and independence. And through a series of connections, I came to this: Debbie Ford’s powerful Vow of Independence.
“When you have emotional independence, you want for nothing because you have everything.” – Debbie Ford
So, as Debbie shares, today is the day to join me and millions of others in taking a vow of emotional independence. Emotional independence will give you the freedom to love and be loved, to give freely and to receive abundantly, to expand rather than contract, to move forward rather than stay stuck, to live in joy rather than misery, to be in control rather than to be controlled, and to be nourished by faith rather than diminished by fear.
I encourage you to take the vow now.
The Vow of Emotional Independence
This vow’s proclamation says I, ______________, will no longer be bound by the slavery of my past.
I will never again give my power away to some food, substance or disempowering craving.
I will stop allowing others to define who I am and I will stand for my highest expression.
I will stop trying to please others and instead please myself.
I will stop listening to the voice of my critical internal mother and father and I will listen to the voice of my most supportive and loving self.
I will break free from the strangulating grip of my self-defeating behaviors and choose powerfully each and every moment to make choices that leave me feeling great about myself and my life.
I take this vow NOW as a positive stand for my soul’s highest expression and for every man, woman, and child on this planet today.
As I set myself free, I am freeing all others from the violence of my darkest thoughts and my negative projections.
And now, as I close my eyes, I ask all the powers that be to support me in living this vow each and every moment of each and every day.
And it shall be.
***
Debbie Ford’s life’s work has been to support others in freeing themselves from the grips of their limited self. And today, as we approach Independence Day in America Ishe is proud to share her film with you that is already freeing people from the bonds of their past and changing the lives of others around the world.
The Shadow Effect guarantees that you take a quantum leap toward emotional freedom. Without this priceless information and without understanding the mechanism of your humanity you will forever stay trapped inside the confines of your limited egoic self.
As she stands for your emotional independence today, she invites you to take this profound step into your light, with love and respect.
***
I am blessed to include Rochelle Schwartz, Master Certified Integrative Coach, from the Ford Institute, among the amazing women who are a part of the Wise Well Women Inner Circle. If you would like to further explore the work of Debbie Ford, as I have, through the guidance of this compassionate woman, please reach out to connect to Rochelle at coachrochelle@rochelleschwartz.com.
To hear the Wise Well Women’s Expert Series Conversation with Rochelle, entitled “You Can Use Your Divorce as a Catalyst for Healing Your Heart” click here.
Taking Simple Steps to Improve Your Self-Care
A week ago I began to jot down a list of the “must do” things I consider to be part of my necessary practice of self-care. I quickly came up with 10 items. And as I looked at the list, I immediately asked myself the question, “If I had to pick one of those things to do for myself that I couldn’t live without, which one would it be?”
That’s a really tough question for me. They are all so important to helping me stay physically and emotionally well that I don’t think I could live without any of them.
Certainly, though, when I get really honest with myself, I am more focused and disciplined in some areas than I am in others.
And as I allowed my thoughts to wander, I was drawn to the question “if I polled varying groups of women, how would they rate these items in level of importance to them?”. That was followed by, “could I discover the 5 Most Important Self-Care Practices?”.
So I gathered up my list, and sent it out to a few women as a test, and I was surprised that I didn’t get any stand out answers. Every woman said something different! The best part is that what they did say is that the simple act of thinking about their self-care practices made them realize they needed to shift some energy in that direction.
And better yet, one woman rated her list with what she wanted her priorities to be, and what she thought they currently were and wrote in that she was surprised and enlightened by seeing her gaps on paper.
So, if you want to give it a try, I’ve included the list below. Rate each item with the number 1 – 10, with each item receiving a unique value, and 1 being the most important to you, and 10 being the least. Don’t use any number more than once.
Meditation/Prayer
Journalling/Scripting
Exercise
Eating Well
Affirmative Reading
Group Support
Mentor/Coach Support
Resting/Sleeping Well
Maintaining a nurturing environment
Participating in a creative process (painting, singing, writing, cooking)
Feel free to add your own if I missed something.
Honestly, are you giving your priority items your full attention? Are you truly practicing self-care? I know the past two weeks I have not been — and boy, do I feel it. And though I generally do a good job of staying on track with my journaling, affirmative reading and group and coach support, I still have not found my rhythym with eating well and exercising consistently. Writing up this little exercise made it obvious to me that I need to direct some energy to those areas.
What practices are the most important to you? Please share your thoughts with me. Post a comment on this blog, or comment on my Facebook page at http://companies.to/wisewellwomen. I’ll be compiling and share the total results here, too.
So, today I commit to making exercise and eating well an integral part of my self-care practice. I’m not sure yet what that’s going to look like or how I’m going to do it, but I know I’ll get there.
Will you join me?
“The Secret to Living as a Wise Well Woman Revealed”
Is there a secret to being a wise, well woman?
Am I a wise, well woman?
And for that matter, what is a wise, well woman?
When can I consider myself a wise, well woman? Do I earn that designation somehow and do I have to be “old” to be wise? Maybe when I’m old, someone will tell me.
If I asked you to describe a woman who is wise, what would you say? What words come to mind?
Gentle, kind, thoughtful, like a grandmother…
Smart, intelligent, perceptive, like a college professor…
Caring, compassionate, intuitive, like a nurse…
Selfless, giving, open-hearted, like Mother Theresa…
And to be well, means to be what?
Physically and emotionally healthy.
Balanced.
Centered.
At peace with oneself.
Mirriam Webster’s online dictionary tells us
To be WISE is: characterized by wisdom : marked by deep understanding, keen discernment, and a capacity for sound judgment; and suggests great understanding of people and of situations and unusual discernment and judgment in dealing with them.
To be WELL is: To live to an extent approaching completeness; without doubt or question; in a kindly or friendly manner; with skill or aptitude; where wellness is the quality or state of being in good health especially as an actively sought goal.
For me, the secret to being a wise, well woman is really no secret at all…
A wise, well woman is one who presents her authentic self to the world
each and every day, with joy and pride, and encourages others to do the same.
She shares her truth with courage, openly and honestly.
With passion, the wise, well woman lives life on life’s terms.
She chooses each moment to step bravely in the direction of her higher purpose.
The wise, well woman extends love to all.
She is guided by a deep faith in the God of her choosing, and
she carries a message of hope to all those in need.
And who might I use as a role model? Pat and Ruth Williams compiled a wonderful book called “How to Be Like Women of Influence”, full of more than enough incredible women to chose from:
Mary Kay Ash, Anne Frank, Golda Meir, Helen Keller, Oprah Winfrey, Eleanor Roosevelt, Mother Teresa and Sandra Day O’Connor, are just a few mentioned here.
Each of these women has been an inspiration to so many! Who is your “woman of influence” ?
And who might you be influencing today?
Someone is looking up to you. Are you living as a wise, well woman?
In the spirit of wisdom, wellness and prosperity—
Nanette
