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Wallowing in The Muck of Stuck?
Grab onto a Life Ring!
I know the feeling…
You’re working soooooooo hard, and doing all the right things, and you’re finally starting to feel like you’re making progress, and then,
WHAM!
Something happens that just derails you. You know it “shouldn’t”…
(you’ve done lots of inner work, personal development, etc. and you’ve got a handle on your energy, right?) But it knocks you down. And you can’t get up…
You are stuck.
And the longer you stay there the worse it gets.
You see, even though I’ve spent many years making personal
development a priority in my life and I’ve developed a self-care
practice that I know keeps me grounded, AND supports me to live
a life I love, I have to admit that sometimes I allow myself to
wallow in my old bad habits and tune into noise and distraction
rather than to inspire.
Negative messaging has been a part of my life forever.
I have fun saying that it is “hardcoded in my DNA”, and that’s
not just an expression of mine, I believe it to be true.
Some patterns die hard… and my personal replay button is stuck
when it comes to negative messaging.
For me, negative self-talk is my MUCK. Eckhart Tolle calls it’s my
Ego Mind. Napoleon Hill refers to the Six Ghosts of Fear.
Whatever you choose to call it, my negative messaging sounds
like this:
It’s too hard
I can’t figure this out
No one will help me
I’ll never make it
I just can’t
I’d do it but…
If only I had…then…
I’ll never get there
But I have to give up __________.
It’s just not right
But it’s not exactly the way I wanted it
They don’t care anyway
I’m too ___________!
It’s all because of _______________.
Why did this happen to me?!
I GIVE UP!
Maybe I’m not saying “I’m not good enough” verbatim, but my dirty little secret is that I get knocked down by this stuff just like
you do. S&%T happens! Life isn’t perfect every single day.
Everything doesn’t always go exactly as I planned.
And when I’m vulnerable, I slip into old patterns. My friend “Daisy Distraction” comes to play. [If you haven’t met Daisy yet, when you’re finished reading, you can learn more about her here at Meet Daisy Distraction and The Return of Daisy Distraction]
Yet, there is a positive side to this story for me, and there can be one for you, too.
My self-care practice supports me.
Now, armed with my 12 Baby Steps Toolkit close at hand, with
my Inner Wisdom tuned in, I am able to see when a lifeline has been tossed my way.
Most call it synchronicity, or serendipity — this seemingly miraculously coincidence or appearance of the person or thing I
needed to hear — that shakes me free, and allows me to grab the
line and start to pull myself up.
And it isn’t an accident. I created the possibility for that
seemingly miraculous appearance of just the right person,
message or thing I needed to appear.
Here’s how:
Baby Step #4: Create Space and Quiet the Noise
Clean up your clutter. Even if all you can muster is to straighten
up just one pile on your desk. My inspiration this week came from
Napoleon Hill’s “Think and Grow Rich” I uncovered from a pile
on my desk! Turn off the TV and the blarring radio. Go for a walk. Stop. Look
and listen. Can you hear the birds or the wind? If you can’t, keep
listening until you can!
Baby Step #5: Tune in to Your Intuition
Come back from your walk, open your journal and write down
your thoughts. When I’m stuck, I always have questions in my
mind like “What’s wrong with me that I can’t do this?”. I believe
we all have the answers we need inside of ourselves. Ask the
question, then listen to your Inner Voice as it provides the
answer. Use your journal to help. A friend of mine writes her
questions in her journal before she goes to bed, and puts it under
her pillow. She always has her answer in the morning!
Baby Step #8: Partner for Support
Reach out for support. When I’m stuck, at first, I don’t want
anyone to know. What I’ve learned is that admitting my blocks to
someone is the single fastest way for me to start moving again!
Just by sharing my challenges with a trusted partner — a friend,
mastermind partner or my coach– shifts the energy. Don’t turn
down the personal support that’s around you. Next, I pull out my
collection of motivational and inspirational books and CDs and
actively use them to support me, letting my Inner Wisdom select
the right one.
[Remember that Napoleon Hill book I stumbled on this week?
Well, there was a CD package with it, too, now playing in my car!
And it’s no accident that my blocks lately have all been about
money, success and “riches”.]
So, with a little practice and persistence, you can create your
life-ring, too. You can get unstuck!
In fact, I bet you’ve already done it before!
Please share your favorite tips for shaking yourself up, and
finding your lifeline out of the muck of stuck in the comment
section below. We’ll all benefit, I’m sure.
And if you’d like a little support creating your own self-care
a toolkit, simply reach out to me at nanette@12babysteps.com, tell
me you’d like some help, and we’ll find the perfect time to
schedule 15 – 30 minutes of no-cost, no obligation a “First Steps
Breakthrough” support call. I do what I do so that every woman
knows that she has a chance to live a life of joy rather than stress
and struggle. Reach out today.
In the spirit of wisdom, wellness and wealth,
I wish you well–
P.S. If you’d like to learn more about the 12 Baby Steps Coaching Program,
Nanette, aloha. Congratulations! “Wallowing in the Muck of Stuck” creates a strong visual as well as a visceral reaction in me. Way to go on the headline writing!
And, of course, how much better it is that that is the actual subject matter of your post rather than merely a “catchy” “pull them in” headline.
Thank heavens you gave us solutions to get out of the “Muck of Stuck.” Nanette, I love that you have the 12 Baby Steps Toolkit and also give a free session to teach people how they can benefit from learning how to recognize & reach for the lifeline.
Fortunately for me, this particular “issue” has not been one I have had to deal with on a regular basis. One thing that helped me in this regard is something I heard one time, years ago, and it has stayed with me ever since. This is the statement a very successful man that has had such an impact on me.
Things are going to happen in life that gets us down, make sad or ____ (fill in the missing blank). Sooner or later something is going to come along that is going to lift us up, make us happy or _____ (whatever we need). We can stay where we are and wallow until that external incident occurs OR we can choose to decide RIGHT NOW that we are going to be up, be happy or ______.
Powerful thought, wouldn’t you agree, Nanette?
Late last month, Nanette, I wrote a post “Seduce Your Lizard Brain.” In it, I explain why, from a physiological standpoint, we do or don’t do some of things we do. If your clients understand about their lizard brains, that may help get them unstuck as well.
Best wishes for a terrific week. Until next time, aloha. Janet
P.S. By the way, I am familiar with Daisy Distraction.
Thank you, Janet for both the the encouragement to decide RIGHT NOW to change how we exist in the world, and for the reminder of the concept of our lizard brains. I will look up your post for sure.
Wishing you well–
Nanette
Hi Nanette,
I am glad you chose to write on this topic. Everyone is stuck every now and then. And your tips proves excellent to get out of it. I like the baby steps and I am glad about the 12 baby steps coaching program. For free, I think you will over deliver. That is brilliant.
Cheers,
Jane.
Jane-
I’m glad you found my tips useful and I hope you’ll remember “baby steps” the next time you’re feeling a little bogged down.
The no-cost audio e-course is intended to be an introduction to the power of support and an addition to anyone’s self-coaching library. I provide workshops and one-on-one in person, phone and/or email coaching as well.
Wishing you well–
Nanette
Sometimes in the Baby Step # 5 phase I’ll ask:
“How am I currently getting in my own way and preventing myself from…?”
Thanks for sharing that you have your vulnerable moments as well. Sometimes life just comes crashing down and hey, we’re human. Great days, bad days, we have them all. It’s how we react to them (courtesy of a recent post by Janet Callaway) and our attitudes that makes the difference.
I’m a firm believer in reducing clutter and having that quiet space or quiet time. You need to be able to get away from all the “noise” and draw a deep breath. It’s ok to feel a bit overwhelmed but we owe it to ourselves to take a time out; it will aid us in getting unstuck!
Jon,
I love the visual I got when I read “we owe it to ourselves to take a time out”.
Oh, does that feel good! [Just an FYI, I’m a recovering “stress junkie”]
And yes, sometimes that’s exactly what we need to get unstuck.
Wishing you well-
Nanette
Hi Nanette,
Nice Post and glad to see you writing on this topic. You’re sharing some awesome tips here. Thanks for sharing this valuable post.
The 12babysteps.com course looks great. Will going to check it out.
Have a powerful day Nanette.
~Dev
.
Thanks Devesh.
Let me know how the 12 Baby Steps go for you, OK?
Enjoy the day-
Nanette
Hi Nanette,
I loved how you shared your own story when it comes to being a “serial negative mind chatter sufferer” . The great thing is that you know how to manage this with your baby steps approach.
I always remember that I can take a step to change how I feel and the moment I make that decision my feeling changes and I feel the relief.
Just knowing that we can do something, we don’t have to make ourselves helpless is very empowering.
Thanks for sharing this important lesson.
~Marcus
Thank you Marcus, for stopping by to comment here. Yes, I have been a “serial negative mind chatter sufferer”.
Thankfully, that happens less and less these days, but I have to be honest and admit that it does happen.
I appreciate that you reminded us all that we can simply take a step to change how we feel, and it works!
Wishing you well-
Nanette