So I today I posted two videos on YouTube. YEAH!
Funny thing is, I thought this was the first time I had posted anything and I sent a note out to the world calling it “Nanette’s first video”.
And it wasn’t. I had actually posted one a few weeks ago, but I’d forgotten. I forgot because when I heard the fuzzy sound quality I got insanely frustrated trying to “fix” it and when, after hours of trying, I couldn’t make it perfect, I just gave up the video project. AND COMPLETELY FORGOT I’D EVEN POSTED IT!
Now, to be fair, I didn’t tell myself lots of ugly, negative self-talk stuff and I didn’t walk away thinking I’d never come back to it or never be able to do it. I did tell myself I would come back to it again when I felt ready.
But, I did get completely derailed for a long period of time AND I forgot how much progress I’d actually made.
Lately, that seems to be happening when my creative process gets interrupted. In this case, I got interrupted by a “glitch” and I spent far too much energy trying to fix something. I was exhausted from pushing so hard.
Worse yet, that all-consuming energy of frustration seems to have recorded right over those “saved” creative files in my head making them non-existent. I had to stumble on the product of my work to be reminded that I’d actually done it.
And oh boy, did I feel dumb when I did.
Here are the best part…the videos I posted today are EXACTLY the same ones I recorded weeks ago. I didn’t change a thing. The last time I tried to upload these two videos there was no sound. Not fuzzy sound. NO SOUND.
I tried all kinds of workarounds. I called a friend. I sent questions out to forums. I reached out for help (something that’s not easy for me to do…). No answers worked to make the sound play.
Until today. And all I did was open up the files as I’d always done before, and they played!
Are they perfect? Of course not.
What those videos represent is me “Stepping UP” this year.
Yes, I’m scared. Yes, I feel a little foolish (if you watch the videos you’ll see why) and yes, I’ve got a lot to learn.
But practice makes progress.
And celebrating progress, mine and yours brings great joy into my life.
So, celebrate with me at http://www.youtube.com/user/Wisewellwoman.
I’m stepping up in 2010 — how ’bout you?
From baby steps to stepping up to giant leaps!
What practices do you have in place that help you muster the courage to push out of your comfort zone?
Share them with all of us, here, OK?
And if you need some self-care practice ideas, you can find them in my e-report you can get free right here (on my blog) just by filling in the boxes to the right. (And if you downloaded it already, but never really read it…go read it now and let me know how you progress).
Wishing you well!